J. Severe: Why, hey there, Jordan. I see you're contributing to the website.
Jordan: Yes. Yes, I am. I'm your best friend, and as such, I feel a need to assist you on your wiki.
J. Severe: Okay then, Jordan. Go ahead and make this the best dang article JSW has ever seen!
J. Severe: No, of course not, you fat piece of trash! But it can still be pretty nice.
Jordan: (disgustedly) Uh... okay then.
The Team Recruits!Edit
It was the dead of the night! The owls were... they were hooting, so to speak. The stars in the sky... they were, uh, twinkling. You know, like the song. "Twinkle, twinkle, little star", and such. But forget about that. The point is, we were meeting up in the secret hideout - my treehouse. It wasn't so much secret because it was up in a high tree for all to see. But the heck with that. I'm here to right a story, am I not?
Me: Shut the heck up!
Now that we are done with that...
"So, Jordan. What are we gonna do?", Rick asked. "You know very well what we are gonna do. We are gonna break in and find out what's going on!", I instructed. "But we can't! For starters, there are guards all over the place. And second, it's school!", Brian said. "I can't stand it in school, let alone at night", Nigel said. "Fine. If you guys are gonna be a bunch of sissies, so BE it!", I said, "We are the most popular kids in school. And what use are we if we can't do anything?", I asked. "At least we can get by on our looks", Susan said. "You know what, Sue? I'm tired of you!", I shouted.
"Tired of how miraculously beautiful I am?", she asked. I lunged at her! She dodged the attack and I fell out of the tree and hit the ground below! "That's gonna leave a mark", Brian said. "Shut up!", I yelled from feet below. "Just get your equipment... we're sneaking into school!"
Soon enough, the Cool Kids (that's the name of our organization) left the treehouse and ventured into the night. "Yo dawg, it's mad cold out here!", Brian said. "Shut up, Bri. If you didn't want to get cold, you should've just stayed at home like a little baby and have your mommy feed you!", I taunted. "Hey, Jordan! That was cold!", Brian said. "And so is your brain. No wonder it's not working; it's frozen in a block of ice", I retorted. Brian lunged at me, but I was able to hold his head back and he couldn't strangle me. "Jordan, you're being a jerk!", Sue complained. "No. I'm just being miraculously beautiful ", I taunted. Sue swung at me too! Just as I ducked, Brian head-butted into me! I flew back and hit the bushes!
"Everyone stop! We're working together, not beating each other to a pulp!", Rick interrupted. "He's right", I said, standing up. "We should --" "And why are you talking, Jordan? You're the guy who started this", Sue said. "Well, uh --", I stammered. She was right. I had started this. "Fine, then. I'm sorry", I apologized. Everyone stood there as if they had seen a ghost. "What are you looking at, bozos?", I asked. "You just apologized. Man, you never apologize. This is a historic event", Brian said. "Eh shut up and keep walking, dipstick", I said.
At last, we arrived at the school. "Tell me why we are here again", Rick said. "Because we saw a mysterious green light coming from the school and we must interrogate it", I explained. "Listen, whatever it is, the Feds can investigate and WE can just stay home, eat chips, and play "Grand Theft Auto" on the Wii", Rick suggested. "No, as great as that sounds, we can't. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and we can't spend it playing a hit-and-run game", I said. "But think about it - will you be able to shoot someone's head and survive?", Rick asked. I ignored him and went to the front doors.
I picked in through the window and saw a blinking bright green light. "Whoa. Someone's in there all right", I said. "How are we gonna get inside?", Sue asked. "Well, if we could find an entrance on the roof, we could assemble a grappling hook that would enable us to --", I started. Brian BASHED his head into the doors and they fell over! "Consider the door... open", Brian muttered before falling down unconscious.
Rick stayed outside with the unconscious Brian, while Sue and I went forward. "I still feel unsure about this", Sue complained. "Come on, Susan. When we're hailed and praised as heroes, you'll be saying this was the best thing that ever happened to you", I said. "You sound so sure. What happens if we don't get out alive?", she asked. "Come on, what's the worst that could happen?", I replied. Suddenly, we heard some footsteps coming from down the hall. "That", she muttered.
The two of us quickly rushed into the nearest closet. As the mysterious person (or people; there were one) walked by, I heard what they were saying:
Guy #1: Are you sure? Doesn't this seem absurd?
Guy #2: Shut up! They've tortured me for the last time! I will get my revenge!
Guy #1: Wouldn't that make you as bad as them?
Guy #2: Shut up! They said I was crazy! They said I was mad! Well now who's crazy? Now who's mad?!
Guy #1: At the moment, you seem to be, sir.
Guy #2: Shut up, you idiot! I oughta have to thrown in the dungeon!
Guy #1: Sorry, sir.
Guy #2: Shut up! Let's go before someone hears us.
Guy #1: Yes, sir.
Guy #2: Shut up!
Guy #1: Okay, sir.
Guy #2: (slaps Guy #1) Did I not tell you to shut up?!
Guy #1: But, sir, I ---
Guy #2: (slaps Guy #1) Go, ignoramus!
Guy #1: (runs away) Aaaaaaah!
Guy #2: Shut uuuuuuuuup!
"What was that all about?", Sue asked when the two were gone. "Seems to be some confrontation between boss and lackey. In other words, the leader and his minion. It seems that Guy #2 was especially upset for reasons unknown, but clues lead us to believe he was ridiculed by former allies and now intends to get revenge on them by revealing some object and/or creature. Guy #1 seemed to fear Guy #2 as if he could do some harm to him", I inferred.
"Wow. Did you just say all that from scratch?", Sue asked. "Why, yes. Yes, I did. If you have a problem with that, take it up with my lawyer. But for the time being, let's keep going", I said, and opened the door. Sue & I continued walking along the hallway. At last, we came to some huge double doors of which the aforementioned green light seemed to be spewing from. "That's the Gym. What the heck is going on in there?", Sue asked. "That's what we're about to find out", I said, triumphantly, and opened the door.
Once inside, I took a quick glance. There was a dozen scientists with a few ray guns, and in the center, a giant laser that was pointing to a hole in the center. In the far corner, there was a cage - the contents of which were hidden by some tarp. Before I could reach a conclusion, I saw a ray of energy coming straight at me! I quickly dodged on the ground as the ray of energy flew into the hallway and crashed into a locker, causing an explosion! "Stop that boy!", a scientist yelled. A whole bunch of them came rushing at me with ray guns! Just when I thought it was all over, I heard a "CRASH!", then a "ROAR!", and a deafening "BOOM!" When the dust cleared, I opened my eyes to a horrifying sight.